Celebrity Street Style/June
Well first off, I really want to thank all the beautiful women at WWWD for doing such a great job with my photo. ItÂ's one of the best airbrushes I have ever seen. I love my new nose, and you removed the herpes from my mouth perfectly. Also, for all the women out there who are wondering what God-given structure connects to this floating head, I am 5Â'2Â", I weigh a solid 224 pounds and my boobs are bigger than my older sisterÂ's. All right, enough about me, let's talk fashion.
1. Kate Bosworth
I got so excited when I saw this picture because I have the same shoes! I belong to this really cool ninja secret societyÂ--I canÂ't reveal much about this organization, but what I can say is she is wearing the same shoes we use for our training sessions. As for the rest of the outfit, I guess itÂ's a little boring, isnÂ't it? IÂ'm all for short-shorts (probably because IÂ'm perverted), but does she really need a vest? I feel like she looked in her full-length mirror and was like, Â"Okay Boz, you are looking pretty darn good, but something is for sure missing...but what the hell is it? Oh, I know, why donÂ't I throw on a vest!Â" Overall she reminds me of a semi-attractive tour guide.
I had to ask my friend who this was, because I couldnÂ't see her face through the reflective window she is wearing. Okay, I understand that HUGE sunglasses are really Â'hip,Â' but when they are big enough to install windshield wipers and fog lights on, they have gone a little too far. Luckily she isnÂ't calling attention to herself with the color of her bag...I think I could replace it with a stop sign, and no one would be able to tell the difference. As for the shoes, I did some research and they arenÂ't even out in stores yet. They are a part of Starburst's new experimental line up that will be coming out in two-thousand-and-never. I feel like this is the outfit BeyonceÂ's mom made for her as her high school graduation gown (so that she could look slightly cooler than the other girls).
3. Hilary Duff
Do you think Hilary sat in front of the mirror in the morning and figured out how many buttons she was going to do up on her shirt? I imagine it went a little something like this, Â"Okay let's see...one button? Uh oh, half a nip is showing. Two buttons? Dammit, nipple, why wonÂ't you go away? Lucky number three? Yes! Barely covered up and enough to get me on WhoWhatWearDaily!Â" I must say, though, she actually looks great. IÂ'm definitely digging the jeans and belt. Her bag seems to be very Â'hipÂ' and Â'inÂ' (I know nothing about bags nor will I pretend to know anything). I also wanted to note that I love the color and buoyancy of her hair. Although, for some odd reason (and I donÂ't know why) the picture feels like a Pepsi ad.
4. Kate Hudson
Okay, I'm a little pissed at WWWD for cutting me out of this picture. You see, I was on a date with Kate when this photo was taken. I was standing right beside her, carrying Ryder, and we were pointing out a large pile of dog poo she was about to step in, hence the look on her face. I must say I really like this outfit (probably because I picked it out for her earlier that morning). ItÂ's very simple/classy and perfect for the early summertime. The sunglasses are a little large and in charge, but they work on her face. And you are able to see her eyes, so IÂ'm cool with their size. Kate, if you are reading this, thank you for holding my cup of clam chowder, and I look forward to seeing you at our wedding in mid-July.
In conclusion, I just wanted to thank my mom. She always told me I was going to do great things and make an impact on the world. Well...here I am, Mommy. This oneÂ's for you.
Photos of Hilary, Beyonce and Kate H., courtesy of www.infgoff.com
Photo of Kate B, courtesy of www.splashnews.com